JulianfrozeasReya''''''''seyessnappedopen.
"I—I''''''''msorry,sorry—"hestammered,stumblingbaapanic.
Hisheelcaughtawkwardlyontheoversizedplushpawofhermascotsuit.Hisbancegaveledbackward.
Reyafellwithhim.
Hehittheoldcouchwithadullthud.Theworncushionsdidlittletosoftenthefall.Arustedspringpokedathislowerback,makinghisbrowtwitstinctively,thoughnoeyebrowsframedthemotion.
Reya,cushiohethickyersofherbeareandbyJulian''''''''sbody,barelyfelttheimpactatall.
Julianhardlyregisteredthepain.Helurchedupright,wordstumblingoutinafranticrush.
"I''''''''msorry—Ididn''''''''tmean—Ishouldn''''''''t—I—"
Hiswordscaughtmid-sentence.
Reya,stilllyingagainsthischest,liftedheroversizedplushpawsalycuppedhisface.
Thefabricmuffledhertouch,butthecertaintyiurewasunmistakable.Itwasasif,withoouch,shehadpressedapausebutton.Hislipsparted,theapologytremblingontheedgeofhisbreathbutneverformed.
Shelookedathim.
Afaintsmilecurvedhermouth—notmog,notpyful,butquiet,unreadable.
Slowly,deliberately,sheclosedthedistaweenthemagain.
InJulian''''''''swideeyes,surpriseshimmeredlikeastruckmatlytosoften,blossomingintoawarmthsodelicateitunraveledfear.
Theirbreathsmetagain.Iwined.
Reyaclosedhereyesandpressedherlipstohis.
Well,assedforlips.
Juliandidn''''''''treallyhaveany,justaseamwheretheyshould''''''''vebeen.
Thefirsttactwasstrange—softandalien.Curious,Reyaflickedouthertthebarelypartedseamofhismouth,skimminglightlyovertheedgeofhisfroh.
Shehadonlyeverkissedtwopeople—SilverRinganddtheirkissesreekedofsmokeandstaleliquor.
ButJulian...Julian''''''''sbreathwasuedly,afainttrainttoothpastelingeriweenhisteeth.Sheleanedinagain,drawnbythatfreshness,hertonguefliglightlyacrossit.
Theseamofhismouthopenedslightlywider,likehehadfottenhowtobreathe.Reyaslippedhertongueinside,brushingpyfullyagainstthetipofhistouervouslyintoaer.Heshiveredbehher,handsfistinginthecouchfabric
Thatreadelightedher.
Shedeepehekiss,morecuriousnowthanhungry,hermovementsteasing,andsav.
Julian''''''''schestroseandfellsharply.Then,suddenly,hepushedherback,breakingthekisswithaloud,wetpop.
Hisbreathingwasragged.Hesuckedinairlikehe''''''''djusteupfromuer.
"I—I''''''''venever..."Julian''''''''svoicecracked."Neverkissedanyone."
"Iknow,"Reyasaidsimply,asmall,knowingsmiletuggingatherlips.Shefeltaflutterofamusement.
paredtothosepastkisseswhichweregreedy,domineering,careless,Julianwasutterlyinexperience.Hedidn''''''''tresist,buthedidn''''''''trespoher.Itwaslikepressinglipstoawarm,bewilderedstatue,otwitchedunderhertoudhadnoideawhattodowithitshands.
"I—I''''''''veneverhadagirlfriend,"headded,asiffessingashamefulsecret.
Hisentirefacewasnearlyswallowedbytheoversizedbearpawsshewore.Onlyhiseyes,nose,andaerofhismouthpeekedoutfromthesoftfur.Thesightofhim,flusteredandwide-eyed,lookedabsurd—andundeniablyendearing.
Reya''''''''slipscurvedintoasoftsmile."Iknow,"shewhisperedagain,savthewayhefrozeunderhergaze.
Andthen,withoutanotherword,sheleanedin,pressingherlipstohismouthoncemore.
Hisarmsremainedlimpathissides,hisbodycaughtbetweentensionandsurrender,immobile.Hemightaswellhaveturostone.
InthedarknessbehindReya''''''''sclosedeyelids,hishueglowedwarmandgolden,pulsingbrighterwitheveryraggedbreath.Behher,hisbodyglimmeredlikeaminiaturesun,radiatihatseepedintoherchest,threadingthroughherveins.
Andthehungerawokeinher,sharpandunyielding.Herlipspressedtohis,drawily,instinctively.Aslowsipatfirst,herlipscoaxingthinrivuletsfromhim,likeliquidsunlightslippingacrosshertongue,electrifyingahenslehreadsofpalegoldwoveintoher,fireamsoflifethatslippedquietlyfromhim,carryingavitalityshecouldalmostfeelsettlinginherbones.
EversierswithdSilverRing,Reyahadbeguntosensesomethingnewinherbody,powersshehadyettomaster,forcesthatdemarol.
Backthen,shehadwrestledwiththeessenceshedrewfrommen.Ittookherquitesometimestolearnhowto"digest",to"assimite"theenergyintoherself.
Thecravingitsparkedhadbeenoverwhelming,driviheedge,makingherrestless.Shehadehesetwomonsters''''''''perversionsagainandagain,desperatetofeelthatsurgeoflifeabsorbedintoher.
Shedidn''''''''tknowhowJulianwouldreact—orifhewouldeve—butshefeltitinthewarmth,ihmofhispulse:notcruel,nottwisted.Alive,andluminous.
Julian,meanwhile,seemedtobesltrolofhisbody.Hisarmsrose,cirgtheoversizedbearecradledagainsthim.Hisfihreadedintothesoftfur,gingtoit,seargforherrealform.
Thesuitbegantofeellikeabarrier.Reyawriggled,twistingslightlytoescapeitssuffogbulk.Shepulledawayfromhismouthagain.
Julianlookeddazed,chestheaving,eyesunfocused,asifhemightcolpseatanymoment.Theywerelockedonher,bewilderedaruck.
"Helpme."
Reyasatup,reagforthezipperoheoversizedpawsmadeitnearlyimpossible—herfingerskeptslippingoffthetialpull.
Juliahergaze,silentlyaskingforfirmation.
"Justhurry,"shesaid,impatienceflickeringinhervoice.
Hishandstrembledastheybrushedthroughtheplushfur,finallyfindingthezipper.Long,fine-bonedfihekindthatcouldhavebelooanartist—ifnotforthemottledburnscarsscatteredacrossthemlikewhispersofpastpain
Reyawriggledfreefromthemascotsuitlikeacicadasheddingitsshell.Shefinallyslippedherhandsoutoftheheavypawsanddidn''''''''twasteamoment,tuggingupthehemofhisshirttorevealfirm,leanmusclebeh—betterthanshehadexpected.
Herfiracedthemapofoldinjuriesetchedintohisskin,movingwithacurious,almostreverenttouch.
Aflickerofsadnesspassedthroughhiseyes,buthedidn''''''''tpulway.
"I''''''''m...notgood-looking."
Reyanodded,matter-of-fact."You''''''''redefinitelydifferentfromtheothers."
Julianblinked,caughtoffguardbyherbluntness.Afainthurtcrossedhisface.
"Thenwhyareyou—"
Shegnceddownatherself,voicecalm,almostdistant."I''''''''mnotliketheotherseither."
BeheloosewhiteT-shirtginglightlytoherframe,sheworenothing.
Reyahadneverlikedbras.Shehadneveruoodwhyhumanwomenchosetobindthemselvessotightly.Hernipplesandareocarriedlittlepigment,paleandnearlytranslut,leavinglittleriskofanythingshowingthroughthethinfabriawaythatmightembarrassher.
ButwithJuliansoclose,evecottoncouldn''''''''tcealthegentlecurvesofherbreastsorthedelicateriseofhernipples.
Colordeepenedacrosstherawpatchesofhisskin,turninghisalreadymottledplexionadarkershadeofcrimson—almostgrotesque,yetheartbreakinglyvulnerable.
"You...you''''''''rebeautiful,"hewhispered,voicehoarse.HisAdam''''''''sapplebobbedasheswallowed.
Hiseyesdartedaway,uoholdthesightofhersonear,sounguarded.
Reyatoyedwithhisfingersforamomeouchlightandunhurried,asifstudyingacuriousartifact.Then,withanalmostpyfulindifference,sheguidedhishahthehemofhershirt,pgitgentlyagainstthesoftnessofherchest.
"Ifyouwanttotouch,"shesaidsoftly,"thentouch."
Julianfroze.Hisbreathcaught,aurnedhisheadsharplytolookather,stunned.Hishaedstifflyagainstherskin,unmoving,likeitdidn''''''''tbelongtohimanymore.
Thatletter,he''''''''dwrittenitlongago.Thewordshadbledoutofhimlikeafessionheneverdaredtospeakaloud.Buthecouldneverbringhimselftodeliverit.
Lately,withthehauntedhouseunderrenovation,themanagerhadn''''''''tofferedhimotherwork.Therewasn''''''''tmuchhecoulddoanyway.Withtheburnsacrosshisskinandthelossofsweatgheplushmascotsuitsweredangerous—trappihreateningseizuresinthiskindofweather.
Sohestayedhome.Dayafterday,nightafternight,eating,sleeping,wakingonlytofiillthere,etchedintohismindlikeafeverdream.Buteveninhiswildestfantasies,hehadneverdaredtoimagihismoment.
Hishandwasrge,andunderhispalm,Reya''''''''sbreastwassmall,barelyenoughtofillhisgrasp,butsoft,resilient,astonishinglyreal.Thetexturealoteredallthevague,distantimaginingshehadoertainedinsilence.
Inallhisyears,hehadouchedanyonelikethis,certainlynotawoman,andneversomeoneyoung,warm,alive.
Reya''''''''sboldnesslefthimspeechless.Thelingerinessofhertastestillgtohistongue,herweightsettledonhisthighslikesomethingunshakablyreal,andbeforehim,herskin,paleaspor,feltimpossiblysmoothbehhistremblingfingers.
Itwastoomuch.Toooverwhelming.Hismindreeled.
Maybethiswasadream.
Maybehisoverheated,restlessbrainhadfinallyiedanillusiontoobeautifultobetrusted.
Becausesomeonelikehim—scarred,silent,strange—howcouldsomeonelikeReya,soradiantandkind,everwantto...